- Thread starter
- #1
Jack_John_Mark
¿Cómo está usted?
- 60,089
- 2,186
- 173
- Joined
- Jan 11, 2010
- Location
- Lincoln, NE
- Hoopla Cash
- $ 100.00
- Fav. Team #1
- Fav. Team #2
- Fav. Team #3
I was standing on #9 tee about to finish 9 holes and I was having a nice little round of golf......was sitting at 2 under par.
So there I was getting a little cocky around my friends. I says to them, I says, "After I put this thing in and shoot a 32 who is gonna buy me a drink?"
We were all joking around mouthing off back and forth when suddenly all I remember is hearing a loud SMACK! And then a nonstop ringing for about 30 seconds. Then the next thing I know 5 hours has passed and I'm sitting in the basement of my house with people asking me my name and other questions like this.
My dad asked me if I remembered who the Huskers played today (as a trick to see where I was at mentally)......I responded by saying we lost to Minnesota in embarrassing fashion.
This was not good as we played Minnesota about 8 months ago. My dad leaves to go call the hospital while my girlfriend runs home to get some bandages for my face because her mother is a nurse.
Meanwhile, I SLIP OUT THE BACK DOOR AND HEAD BACK TO THE GOLF COURSE BABY!
Keep in mind, not only am I concussed or whatever, but I am also under the influence. So out to the course I went. I hopped in the cart and there was nobody teeing off on #1 so I took right off and teed off.
Before I could leave #1 tee the Club Pro saw me and stopped me saying, "are you sure you should be doing this?" I said, "fuck yes....you wanna play?" He said, "no, but I think someone should be with you as you can't be in the right mind." I said, "well hop in then dumbshit!"
So he rides along. With blood oozing out of a gash in my right cheekbone, and not being able to see completely out of my right eye, I proceeded to birdie the first 5 holes in a row. The course record is 7 under par, so all I needed to do was birdie 2 more of the last 4 holes in order to tie the record.
I parred #6 and ran out of beer at that point. I told Todd (Club Pro) that we needed to head back in and get some more beer, but he wouldn't let me. He said right now his only concern is getting me back safe as I am probably concussed/drunk and don't know who or where I am. I disagreed completely, but played on anyways.
I went on to hit amazing drives on #7 and #8, both par 4's, and birdied both of them. There I was.......tied for the course record with one hole to go. I step up to #9 tee, a par 3......just needed to put it on the green. I teed it up...........and over the green, out of bounds it went. FUCK! I grabbed a 6 iron thinking it was a 9 iron. So I go back to my bag, now flustered, concussed, drunk, fucked up, and I grab another club..........BOOM! Over the green and out of bounds it goes. I had grabbed a 5 iron. How could this possibly be happening?
Guess what though........I would have known none of this if not for being told tonight at the hospital. See, after I hit that second shot out of bounds, I blacked out right on the tee box and Todd rushed me into town to the ER. I was diagnosed with a grade 3 concussion. The doctors said they have no idea how I was able to even walk let alone make my way back to the golf course and play a round of golf......but they concluded that the amount of alcohol I had drank was actually probably giving me enough energy to overcome the concussion and do this.
Todd was there to tell about the epic round of golf that I had going. That is how I know of all these specifics. My best 9-hole round ever is a 31.......I would have had a 29 had I parred that hole.
All I can do is take his word for it. I'll never really know for sure. I am finally coming back to life right now. This is my 2nd bad concussion in the past 3 years.
So there I was getting a little cocky around my friends. I says to them, I says, "After I put this thing in and shoot a 32 who is gonna buy me a drink?"
We were all joking around mouthing off back and forth when suddenly all I remember is hearing a loud SMACK! And then a nonstop ringing for about 30 seconds. Then the next thing I know 5 hours has passed and I'm sitting in the basement of my house with people asking me my name and other questions like this.
My dad asked me if I remembered who the Huskers played today (as a trick to see where I was at mentally)......I responded by saying we lost to Minnesota in embarrassing fashion.
This was not good as we played Minnesota about 8 months ago. My dad leaves to go call the hospital while my girlfriend runs home to get some bandages for my face because her mother is a nurse.
Meanwhile, I SLIP OUT THE BACK DOOR AND HEAD BACK TO THE GOLF COURSE BABY!
Keep in mind, not only am I concussed or whatever, but I am also under the influence. So out to the course I went. I hopped in the cart and there was nobody teeing off on #1 so I took right off and teed off.
Before I could leave #1 tee the Club Pro saw me and stopped me saying, "are you sure you should be doing this?" I said, "fuck yes....you wanna play?" He said, "no, but I think someone should be with you as you can't be in the right mind." I said, "well hop in then dumbshit!"
So he rides along. With blood oozing out of a gash in my right cheekbone, and not being able to see completely out of my right eye, I proceeded to birdie the first 5 holes in a row. The course record is 7 under par, so all I needed to do was birdie 2 more of the last 4 holes in order to tie the record.
I parred #6 and ran out of beer at that point. I told Todd (Club Pro) that we needed to head back in and get some more beer, but he wouldn't let me. He said right now his only concern is getting me back safe as I am probably concussed/drunk and don't know who or where I am. I disagreed completely, but played on anyways.
I went on to hit amazing drives on #7 and #8, both par 4's, and birdied both of them. There I was.......tied for the course record with one hole to go. I step up to #9 tee, a par 3......just needed to put it on the green. I teed it up...........and over the green, out of bounds it went. FUCK! I grabbed a 6 iron thinking it was a 9 iron. So I go back to my bag, now flustered, concussed, drunk, fucked up, and I grab another club..........BOOM! Over the green and out of bounds it goes. I had grabbed a 5 iron. How could this possibly be happening?
Guess what though........I would have known none of this if not for being told tonight at the hospital. See, after I hit that second shot out of bounds, I blacked out right on the tee box and Todd rushed me into town to the ER. I was diagnosed with a grade 3 concussion. The doctors said they have no idea how I was able to even walk let alone make my way back to the golf course and play a round of golf......but they concluded that the amount of alcohol I had drank was actually probably giving me enough energy to overcome the concussion and do this.
Todd was there to tell about the epic round of golf that I had going. That is how I know of all these specifics. My best 9-hole round ever is a 31.......I would have had a 29 had I parred that hole.
All I can do is take his word for it. I'll never really know for sure. I am finally coming back to life right now. This is my 2nd bad concussion in the past 3 years.
